I joined a gym three separate times after having kids. Three times I paid for membership, went enthusiastically for maybe two weeks, then never went back. The membership just quietly drained my bank account for months before I finally admitted defeat and canceled.
The problem wasn’t motivation. I wanted to exercise. I knew it would make me feel better. But actually getting there required finding childcare, packing a bag, driving there, working out, driving back, showering before doing anything else. We’re talking two hours minimum for maybe forty minutes of actual exercise.
I don’t have two hour blocks of free time. I barely have twenty minute blocks.
So for a long time I just didn’t exercise. Told myself I’d get back to it when kids were older. When things calmed down. When I had more time.
Spoiler: things didn’t calm down and more time never appeared.
What finally worked was letting go of what I thought exercise was supposed to look like and getting creative about fitting movement into the life I actually have. Not the life I wish I had. Not some future life with endless free time. This one. Right now.
Here’s what I’ve figured out.
I used to think exercise only counted if it was a “real” workout. At least thirty minutes. Dedicated workout clothes. Sweating. Feeling like I’d really done something.
That mindset kept me from exercising at all for years. Because those real workouts rarely happened I figured there was no point doing anything less.
Here’s the thing though. Everything counts. Ten minutes counts. Five minutes counts. Moving your body in any way that gets heart rate up or builds strength counts.
Research actually supports this. Multiple short bursts throughout the day provide similar benefits to one longer session. So ten minutes while dinner is cooking? Real exercise. Five minutes while waiting for kids to finish getting ready? Also counts.
Once I stopped thinking of exercise as this big production requiring special time and started thinking of it as something I sprinkle throughout the day, everything changed.
Some moms prefer getting movement done first thing. If that’s you, here’s what works without leaving the house.
YouTube workouts while kids sleep. Approximately one million free workout videos out there. Short ones, long ones, quiet ones for when you’re trying not to wake anyone. I like Yoga with Adriene for gentle morning stuff and Sydney Cummings when I want intensity. Ten to twenty minutes totally doable before kids are up.
Quick strength circuit. No video needed. Pick four or five exercises and rotate through. Squats, push-ups, lunges, planks, jumping jacks. Each one for a minute, brief rest, repeat. Fifteen minutes and you’ve gotten a legitimate workout.
Morning stretching. Doesn’t burn tons of calories but it counts as movement and feels good. I do about five minutes most mornings just to wake up my muscles. Actually look forward to it now.
Key to morning exercise is having everything ready. Clothes set out. Plan for what you’re doing. If you have to think too much when you’re half awake it probably won’t happen.
This is where I’ve had most success honestly. Instead of finding time away from kids to exercise I started finding ways to move while I’m with them.
Family walks and bike rides. Obvious but effective. Walk to places when we can instead of driving. Family bike rides in evenings. Weekend hikes. Even just walking around the neighborhood looking for rocks or bugs. I’m moving, kids are moving, everyone wins.
Playing actively. When kids ask me to play I try to say yes to active stuff. Tag in the backyard. Soccer. Dancing in the living room. Swimming. Not traditional workouts but definitely getting my heart rate up.
Playground workouts. While kids play I don’t just sit on the bench anymore. Walk laps around the playground. Step-ups on benches. Pull-up attempts on monkey bars though that’s humbling. Might feel silly at first but nobody’s paying attention. They’re watching their own kids.
Active games during witching hour. That rough stretch before dinner when everyone’s tired and cranky. Started using it for active games instead of screens. Freeze dance. Backyard relay races. Obstacle courses. I’m exercising, they’re burning energy before dinner. Everyone’s mood improves.
If you have younger kids who nap or older kids who do quiet time, this window is gold. I know the temptation is using it for everything you can’t do while they’re awake. Chores. Work. Scrolling in peace.
But consider using even part of it for movement.
At-home workout videos. When I do a longer workout this is usually when. Twenty to thirty minutes with YouTube or a fitness app. Nobody interrupting. Nobody needing anything.
Dance cardio in the living room. Sometimes I just put on music and dance around like nobody’s watching. Because nobody is. Doesn’t look like a workout but heart rate is up and I’m sweating and I feel great after.
Strength training with household items. Don’t need dumbbells. Gallon of milk weighs about eight pounds. Laundry detergent bottles work great. Canned goods. Heavy books. Done entire strength workouts with stuff from around the house.
This saves me on really busy days when there’s no twenty minute window anywhere.
Instead of one workout, tiny bursts throughout the day. Few minutes here, few there. By end of day it adds up.
Squats while brushing teeth. Two minutes twice a day. Four minutes of squats daily just by habit stacking.
Wall push-ups waiting for microwave. Those two minutes add up.
Calf raises washing dishes. Standing there anyway.
Lunges down the hallway. Whenever I’m walking somewhere and remember, I lunge instead of walk. Kids think it’s hilarious which makes me more likely to do it.
Plank during commercial breaks. Or during opening credits if you’re streaming.
Dance for one song. Put on something you love and dance hard for three minutes. Burst of cardio that actually makes a difference.
None of these feel like workouts. But little bits throughout the day means you’ve moved way more than if you did nothing waiting for a big workout that never happened.
Knowing what you could do isn’t the same as doing it. Ideas stay ideas without some kind of system.
What helps me:
Schedule it like an appointment. Look at day and identify when exercise could realistically happen. Then mentally commit. Not maybe I’ll work out during nap but I am working out at 1pm during nap.
Have a go-to option. When I have to think about what workout to do I often do nothing because decision feels like too much. So I have a default. No plan? Twenty minute YouTube video from favorite channel. Decision made.
Keep workout clothes accessible. Don’t change into them first thing but do wear clothes I could exercise in. Leggings and t-shirt. No barrier of needing to change.
Lower the bar on hard days. Some days twenty minutes isn’t happening. Goal becomes just do something. Five minutes. Ten minutes. Walk around the block. Not about perfection. About maintaining the habit.
Give yourself credit. Used to dismiss anything that wasn’t a real workout. Now I acknowledge everything. Played tag fifteen minutes? Exercise. Walked to school? Exercise. Danced in kitchen? Exercise. Recognizing it helps me feel good about what I’m doing instead of guilty about what I’m not.
Something that took me too long to accept.
Perfect workout routine doesn’t exist. At least not for moms raising young kids. No amount of planning gives you uninterrupted gym time or long peaceful runs or whatever fitness looked like before.
Chasing that ideal just leads to frustration and giving up entirely.
What matters is moving your body regularly in whatever way fits your actual life. Some days thirty minute workout. Some days ten minute walk. Some days dancing with kids and calling it good.
All of it helps. All of it counts. Your body doesn’t know difference between gym movement and home movement. Just knows you moved.
Everyone knows exercise is good for your body. Cardiovascular health, strength, all that stuff.
But here’s what actually motivates me:
Mood is better. Significantly. Even ten minutes shifts something in my brain. More patient with kids. Less snappy with husband. More like myself.
More energy. Seems counterintuitive but true. Exercise gives energy instead of depleting it. Days I move I don’t hit afternoon wall as hard.
Sleep better. Not perfectly because kids but better. Body is actually tired in a good way.
Modeling something. Kids see me prioritizing movement. See that exercise is part of life not a chore or punishment. That’s a gift even if I don’t have gym time.
Feel accomplished. Days when nothing else goes right at least I moved my body. Something I did for myself. Matters.
Whatever exercise looks like in your life, worth figuring out. Not for some future smaller body or because you should. Because you’ll feel better. Today.
What does exercise look like for you right now? What’s the biggest barrier? Always curious because I think we all struggle with this and talking about it helps.
